Campfire Apples & Peaches With Whiskey Caramel Sauce

 On a camping trip many moons ago, Robb and I invented an alternative to the classic s'more: we chopped up an apple and threw it onto a piece of foil with a few caramel candies, then we wrapped it up and chucked it into the fire. Once we extracted the bundle, it was pretty yummy. But it wasn't perfect. I seem to recall that the apples weren't cooked evenly, and the caramel stuck to the foil in places and melted in an altogether questionable manner, as though it wasn't quite sure what to do.

Many summers have passed since then, but as Robb and I shopped for our camping trip this last weekend, I found myself thinking fondly of our apple experiment and wanting to do better. The truth of the matter, which I might as well confess now, is that I'm a little tired of s'mores. The stick-hunting, the messiness, the way I always break the graham cracker in the wrong place. (I mean, it's perforated...how hard can it be?) But I DO love dessert, especially while sitting around a campfire, and so I once again reached for a couple of apples and a bag of caramels as I perused the ShopRite aisles.

We were lucky enough to have a visitor join us for dinner at our campground! Morgan, who has made the wise choice to live on a lake in the woods, was a mere hour drive from our camp site and gamely drove up to have dinner with us. After consuming chips and guacamole, stinky cheese and olive bread, corn drenched in hot butter, asparagus drenched in garlic butter, and steaks (for them) and veggie sausages (for me), we got to thinking about dessert.

Robb and I are pretty low-maintenence campers. We should probably have a camping stove. Hell, we should probably have camping chairs. But in a way, we can't be bothered. Instead we just bring an old, cruddy skillet that we can put on the fire, and when we're ready to eat, we sit on a picnic bench or perhaps a log. Done and done.

As I chopped up apples for dessert, I started eyeing all of the ingredients splayed out on the picnic table and came up with a master plan. Instead of just apples, let's also use these peaches we bought from the farm today. And instead of foil, let's use the skillet. And instead of just caramels, let's add some butter. And just when you think it's done, let's douse the whole thing in whiskey and light it on fire.

 The "lighting on fire" part was particularly exciting as it requires that you dip the pan into the flames so the fruits are terrifyingly close to falling out, then watch as the pan ignites.

When the blue flames appear, you know something magical is happening.

Incidentally, we had to do the whiskey flambe part a few times so that I could get a decent photograph (a task I am still not sure we achieved), so our sauce turned out especially lively.

But wowie zowie was it delicious. After we ran out of the cooked fruit in the pan, we started cutting more fruit and running it through the bottom of the pan. And then I had to get gross and lick the spatula.

  

If you, too, would like to lick the spatula on your next camping trip or even at your next backyard campout, here is the official recipe!:

Campire Apples & Peaches With Whiskey Caramel Sauce

1 or 2 apples (I like Pink Lady)

1 or 2 peaches

8 to 10 squares of soft caramel candies

2 tablespoons butter

2 (or 3 or 4) ounces whiskey (I like Jameson)

Chop up the apples and peaches into bite-size chunks and toss in the skillet with caramel candies and butter. Place the skillet over the fire and stir the ingredients now and then with a spatula (or just flip the fruit around in the pan a bit). Once the caramel and butter begin to melt, keep stirring and let everything get nice and oozy. After a few minutes, appoint a brave person to reach into the pan and try an apple...when it's soft, you're ready to add your booze. Pour the whiskey right into the pan, then tilt the pan ever so gently into the flame. When the pan catches fire, keep the ingredients moving by shaking the pan, and try not to get distracted by the squeals of delight erupting all around you. The flames will extinguish after the flames go blue (which is a sign that the alcohol has burned out). Grab a fork...you're ready to eat! For the ultimate campfire experience, I recommend eating straight out of the pan.

Individual Ice Cream Cakes with Homemade Magic Shell

I really could have just stopped typing after writing the title of this post. The title and the recipe for the homemade Magic Shell is all you really need to know, right? Well, I can't help myself...I could wax poetic about the magic and mystery of these cupcakes for the rest of my life. So it is with great enthusiasm that I present to you my latest brainchild: Individual Ice Cream Cakes with Homemade Magic Shell.

(I had to say it again.)

This last weekend, Robb and I hosted an engagement barbecue for two very dear friends, Jess and Ryan. And though an engagement party is usually a grown-up classed-up occasion, we thought Jess and Ryan would enjoy a different approach. So instead we opted for burgers and pinatas in addition to  champagne. Since Ryan has a sweet tooth, I knew I needed to do some kind of dessert. And so it was pure kismet when, two weeks ago, my sister reminded me about the ice cream cake I had made her for her birthday about ten years ago. That cake was highly experimental and involved a 9" cake pan with a thin cake on the bottom, a layer of fresh sliced strawberries, and ice cream packed tightly into the top part of the cake pan. I then doused the whole thing with Magic Shell--I believe it was a very thorough, very thick coating. I recall, for some reason, that it had some problems. Like the frozen strawberries were hard as rocks, or the Magic Shell was tough to cut through, and a "piece" came out of the pan more like a clump. But the concept...I knew there was something there. So ten years later, I decided to try it again in a more manageable cupcake format.

I started with the cake layer, of course. And because we were making a lot of other food for this barbecue and I didn't have a ton of time, I opted to go the Betty Crocker box-cake route (which is always bafflingly tasty if not slightly skanky). I also used prepackaged ice cream, though someday I plan to make these entirely from scratch: homemade cake, homemade ice cream AND homemade Magic Shell. For now, I will just enjoy the irony that the Magic Shell was the only thing in this dessert that I made "from scratch."

I used silver cupcake liners, assuming that the metal would help keep the ice cream cool. Also, I assumed paper would turn to mush after the ice cream began to melt in the heat of a July afternoon. Right? I filled each cup with between 1/8 and 1/4 cup of batter and baked 'em up.

Once the cakes had cooled, I grabbed my two favorite flavors of ice cream--mint chip and coffee chip--and started quickly scooping ice cream on top of each cupcake. I experimented with two strategies: pressing the ice cream down flat so there was a perfect seal between cake and ice cream, and doing more rounded scoops that I sort of firmly pressed into the cake whilst keeping the scoop shape. Aesthetically, I wound up preferring the latter, plus when you pour on the Magic Shell, it sort of drips down into the gaps between the ice cream and cake, filling in those empty spots and making hard little rivulets of crunchy yumminess. However you do it, you'll need to work fast, because, well, ice cream melts. If the ice cream gets too soft, put the carton and the cupcakes back in the freezer and let them harden up again, otherwise it will be hard to get that perfect little scoop shape.

My original intent was NOT to make Magic Shell from scratch. In fact, I only thought of it because it turns out that my local supermarket doesn't carry Magic Shell, but I had already baked my cupcakes and I was hell bent on the concept. So after some Internet sleuthing, I found what turned out to be the recipe. Ready? Here it is:

1 1/4 cups chocolate chips (or any kind of chocolate you like)

1/2 cup coconut oil

Melt them together in the microwave for about a minute, stir until smooth, and drizzle over ice cream.

That's it! Magic, right? I had always thought that Magic Shell was some sort of chemically produced slightly sinister confection, but the concept is really soo so so so simple: coconut oil is liquid when it's heated and hardens up when it's cold. So if you combine the coconut oil and chocolate when they're warm, then pour them over something cold, whamo, it hardens up. SO COOL. Terrifyingly, the same concept would work with butter or crisco or even lard--any kind of fat that hardens up at room temp or colder--but, um, I'm gonna stick to coconut oil for now.

 

The Magic Shell sauce is actually very thin, perfect for drizzling on in its trademark rivulets.

And then almost immediately the chocolate begins to seize up (in the photo above you can see the transformation before your very eyes!)

 

And then, finally, they get their perfectly shellacked finish.

They were treated with an enthusiastic reception at the barbecue! I didn't try one before the party, so I had the pure pleasure of watching people grab them off of the tray as I passed it around and start chomping into them.

 

For me, the beauty is when you pull away the wrapper and examine the cupcake's cross-section. Something about that cakey bottom, the about-to-start-melting ice cream layer, and glistening hardened chocolate, each layer fluted around the edges by the pleated cupcake liner. It is in that moment that you get a rush (could it be adrenaline?) when you realize, my God, I have to start eating this fast, for you know that it's at its very best when the ice cream is cold and the Magic Shell is crisp.

Fireworks & Hamburger Cakes

When I was a teenager, 4th of July was my favorite holiday. The hot weather, the fireworks, warm nights spent out on our quiet street in Thousand Oaks. So quiet, in fact, that on summer nights, me and my friends used to lay down in the middle of the street and look at the stars, which were easy to spot on our hill, away from bright city lights. At some point in my late teens, me and my friends began planning car rallies--which are, essentially, elaborate scavenger hunts that we would set up all over town--on the night before 4th of July, and people would fill their cars with friends and drive from point to point, hunting for clues. At one stop, you might have to dig around a playground until you found the next clue taped to the underside of a swing. At other stops, you might be greeted by one of the planners, who would make someone in your car draw a picture of a pirate. My favorite was the time we made it so you couldn't get your next clue until you gave our friend's mom, Mrs. Reisser, a cigarette. So if no one in your car smoked, you had to go buy a pack and circle back around! We were so very mean. The winning car of the rally always won something really terrible--like, a bunch of stuff from someone's junk drawer, or maybe a mug from Denny's. But the loser always won what we called The Hamburger Cake, which was a prepared cake that you could buy at Albertson's that was made in the shape of a giant hamburger with frostinged-on beef, lettuce, and ketchup. Alongside the cake, of course, were golden cakey fries and a dollop of ketchup-colored frosting to dip them in.

And so it was in a moment of 4th of July nostalgia and passion that I decided to make these cookies. I saw them a few days ago--Martha Stewart's Fireworks Cookies--and I thought to myself, now there's something that I could really make look terrible. As much as I knew I should not attempt to make these cookies, I couldn't help myself. You see, we're going to Morgan's lake house tomorrow, and she's an old friend from back in the car rally days. And, well, there's a little piece of me that enjoys taking something that Martha Stewart perfected and photographed beautifully, and giving it the old Liana spin (i.e., effing it the eff up.)

And so I rolled up my sleeves and made the sugar cookie dough, recalling as I started to roll it out that I don't even really like sugar cookies. I mean, I'd rather have a chocolate chip cookie any day of the week! But still, I carried on, reminding myself that no one ever wanted to eat the hamburger cake. It's more about making a spectacle than making something delicious.

As I manhandled the frosting and coerced it into pastry bags, I also recalled that I don't have much patience for frosting things. And so I hurriedly squeezed out my frosting and ran my toothpick through the concentric circles, and sort of counted the seconds until it was all over. When the cookies were all frosted, however,  I looked at them all together and decided that I LOVE them. They're not so much "patriotic" or "firework-esque" as they are groovy psychedelic hippie cookies, with flower and spiderweb motifs. Totally fine by me. God bless America...these cookies are ridiculous.

In honor of the hamburger cake (i.e., making something weird out of a confection), I used the leftover dough to sculpt what started out as a pig, and then turned into a bear, but eventually became a sheep, all precariously held together with icing that gooped in drips and drabs on its way to becoming hardened.

But I love him all the same. Perhaps we will come up with a game tomorrow at the lake where the pig/bear/sheep will be the last place prize?

And finally, because it's July!!, I thought it was high time to give you a wee garden update. The pole beans and snap peas are my favorite new arrivals. Each morning I go outside hunting for them. They grow inches each day, I swear! And the more you pick them, the more they grow. I spend quite a bit of time internally debating whether each one is long enough to pick, if I should let it grow just a bit longer, or if it's better to get it off the vine. And once I do, what shall I cook? Are there any recipes that only call for six pole beans?

The tomatoes are at my favorite point in their growth--vibrant healthy green with rich and earthy smells that cling to your skin, eau de tomato. And best of all, the plants aren't yet out of control. They're tall--about up to my waist--but aren't yet falling over onto each other, weighed down with fruit, twelve plants turned into a singular mass of unruly tomato monster. It happens every year, and you'll see it this August, but for now, I'm enjoying these little yellow flowers and petite green tomatoes. They're perky, right?
  

Last and decidedly weirdest, the cucumbers. They have started their awkward climb to pickledom. The plant produces these big yellow flowers, and then the cucumber starts to emerge from behind the flower, literally pushing it away from the plant on its tip. I think this is the most ridiculous looking life-form in the garden. It's like if Pinocchio not only had a long nose, but a giant flower on the end. Or it's like  some sort of sexy get-up, like a cabaret dancer wearing pasties...but just on one boob. And yet, and yet! When the cucumber is all grown in a few weeks and I'm eating it on my sandwich, I'll no longer be thinking it's so ridiculous. Though, now that I've said that thing about pasties, I might be thinking about that...oops...my bad.

Either which way, happy summer everyone. Thanks for reading along with my summertime nostalgia and my present revery. May you all find your equivalent of fireworks, hamburger cakes, lake swims, and warm evenings.

Happy Thanksgiving Hats!

Two Thanksgivings ago, a tradition was born in our household. Or perhaps, if we consider the construction paper toppers of kindergarten, the tradition began many many moons ago and was only rediscovered two years ago. Either which way, at our house we make paper hats on Thanksgiving. Oh, and we've never had a child at our house for the holidays. So, um, these are adult Thanksgiving hats. And we love them!

First of all, no one ever wants to be the pilgrim. In this photo, I am wearing the big chief hat that I made for Robb while Julie sports her young warrior feathers.

Kelly, on the other hand, was sort of born to be a pilgrim, don't you think? I love the way that her yellow band matches her cocktail.

The Thanksgiving hat tradition officially began the year before last when a group of our friends got together to make "decorations" for our feast. For our centerpiece, we wrapped construction paper around this paint can and made a bunch of flower-shaped thingies. It only took about four hours to complete. Totally practical!

The BEST paper craft to come out of our decoration party--and one that is still with us and hopefully will be forever--is Julie's "Horn of Just Enough." Julie went into a sort of quiet netherworld on our crafting night and emerged hours later to present to us her paper cornucopia. She cut out all of these little tiny pieces and taped/glued them inside of a rolled up piece of brown paper. But the best part is, everything is so tiny! All of those little grapes! And are those pickles on the bottom right? Seriously, I could spend hours of amusement looking at this thing.
At our house, Thanksgiving is a fancy affair, and we take our hats seriously. As you can see, when I load up the bread basket on the floor because we're officially out of counter space, I still rock my feathers.

And shouldn't every Thanksgiving involve running off to the bathroom with your girlfriends so that you can all check out your hats together?
No matter what Thanksgiving traditions you have in your household--be they culinary traditions, family football games, or weird hat traditions, like ours--we wish you a very very Happy Thanksgiving!

Ryan Devlin's Chili Will Make You See God

I love my friends. I love chili. I love dogs. So since Saturday night included all of these things, it was naturally a really awesome night.

For months now, me, Robb, Jess and Ryan have been talking about having a chili cookoff. This was after a series of dinners where we repeatedly tried to injure each other with hot peppers. (The last one involved a late-night "hot pepper tasting contest" at our house where I offered Jess a slice of cheese to cool the burn of a Thai pepper, and she grabbed the whole hunk of mozarella and put it in her mouth like a compress.) Alas, Jess and Ryan decided to host, and Ryan made the declaration that his chili would "make us see God." And boy, did it! Like a total jerk, his chili was hands-down the best. Pictured above, it ruled the chili universe with a smoky chipotle burn that hit you right in the middle of your forehead, and creamy cannellinis that were a textural odyssey in beanery.

Six people brought over their special blend of chili (only five shown here...Mo's crockpot had yet to arrive), and about 20 or 30 of us milled about tasting, talking, critiquing, and dodging the four dogs that ran about like banshees. Best of all, every single chili was totally unique. From Jess's green chili with chicken to Tom's pork-and-bacon chili with a nice garlicky kick, not a single chili was the least bit similar.
These two lovebirds tasted every chili together and jotted down the heat and flavor ranking for each one in order to accurately tally their results. I don't think "appearance" was judged here because, as you may have noticed, chili is not attractive. That is why there is only one photo of people eating chili...this is literally the only somewhat attractive photo I have from the night. So from here on out I'm going to stop showing pictures of chili.
Know what else isn't attractive?Close-up shots of Chris and I eating cornbread. Okay, enough of the gross food shots, let's move on to the main event: puppies!!
Everyone, this is Mister. He is Jess and Ryan's new puppy, and he is so small and wobbly with the biggest eyes ever. Absolutely irresistable!
He also moves very quickly, so it's hard to keep him in focus. But look at his big blurry eyes!
He's cute when people pet him.
And Mister even helped Jess tally the results of the chili cook-off. I guess I should mention that Ryan's chili won...by a mile! (Total jerk.) We tied Tom for second. Good for us!

Here's Sugar, who I interrupted mid-snooze.
And here's Sugar wondering how my camera will taste.
I can't remember the name of this dog, but he was so hilarious and moved so quickly, this is all of the documentation I have. With his bucking bronco antics, he was our entertainment for the evening, for sure. He, and all of the other dogs, and the chili, and the awesome friends that is.

Thanks for hosting, Jess and Ryan!

Center Stage Bingo

As it happens, I am occasionally not the only mad crafty genius amongst my group of friends. Last night, in fact, I attended a Center Stage viewing party (thanks, Nicole), whereupon me and six awesome girls alternately watched and yelled at the amazingly awful ballet dance movie that is Center Stage. But what really took the movie viewing to the next level were the Center Stage Bingo cards that Julie created in preparation for the event. She created a different card for each person, though each one has a close-up of Peter Gallagher's eyebrows as the "free" square in the center. I particularly love that Julie refuses to call Peter Gallagher by his real name, and instead exclusively refers to him on the game card as Sandy Cohen (of The O.C. fame). Each card was filled with different quotes (like "bitch academy!") and references (like "Maureen vomits" or "Dancer smokes a cigarette"), and, you know, the first one to cross off all their squares wins.

At the end of the night, I scooped up the remaining Bingo cards and fell in love with how everyone chose to fill them out. I find the angry "x's" on the card at the top of this post fascinating. Like look at how many times this person crossed out "A parent MEDDLES." Could this be a cry for help? I also love the two boxes that were left un-crossed: "Sandy Cohen is pompous" and "Someone is 'dancing for me.'" For the record, I agree with this person in that I don't believe Sandy Cohen was ever pompous in the movie, so I also did not check this box on my card. (It's a matter of principal.) As for the "Someone is 'dancing for me,'" that definitely did happen, so this girl was either bored or asleep by the time that happened.

This Center Stage viewing party attendee chose to use festive circles to mark her Bingo card, which I find aesthetically darling. My favorite part? You guessed it: that she chose to forgoe a black-out Bingo card "win" based on the fact that she didn't feel that any of the gay dancers ever acted SUPER GAY. (She felt they only acted regular gay, and that was not enough to check off the box.)

This last Bingo card might be my favorite as it is lovingly adorned with sweet little stars. Plus this person was a true black-out winner! But doesn't it make you a little bit crazy that she didn't put a star in the "free" Sandy Cohen's eyebrows box? My guess is that she just didn't have the heart to cover up such eyebrow perfection. And really, I don't blame her.